Dark Night of the Soul: Meaning, Signs and How to Get Through It

The dark night of the soul is a time when your inner life seems to go dark. Prayer or meditation feels dry. Things that used to give you peace now feel empty. You may feel far from God, from meaning, or from the person you thought you were.

Many people say it arrives after a time of spiritual joy or growth. That makes it even more confusing. It can feel like you did something wrong, or like everything you believed was a mistake.

In our guide to spiritual awakening, the dark night is one of the stages many people pass through. This page looks at it more closely.

The phrase comes from Saint John of the Cross, a Spanish Carmelite friar and poet who lived from 1542 to 1591. He worked with Saint Teresa of Avila to reform their religious order.

Around 1577 to 1579, he wrote a short poem that begins "On a dark night". It tells of a soul slipping out of a quiet house at night to meet the one it loves, meaning God. He later wrote a longer book, known as the Dark Night, that explains the poem line by line.

For John, the dark night was not a punishment. He saw it as a time when God works quietly in the soul, taking away old comforts so a deeper love can grow. The darkness was painful, but he believed it led somewhere good.

Today the phrase is used much more loosely. People of all faiths, and people with no religion, use it for any painful, empty stretch in their spiritual life. Even Mother Teresa, as her letters later showed, went through many years of feeling that God was absent.

Everyone's dark night looks a little different, but these signs come up often:

• Spiritual dryness: Prayer, meditation or worship feels flat, and you do not feel the closeness you used to.
• Loss of old meaning: Goals, beliefs or roles that used to guide you stop making sense.
• Feeling alone: Even around people, you feel like no one understands what you are going through.
• Grief without a clear reason: You feel sad for a life or a self that is falling away.
• A quiet longing: Under the emptiness, you still want truth, peace or God. You just cannot reach it right now.
• Doubt: You question things you felt sure about, including your faith.

This is the most important part of this page. The dark night and depression can look very alike, and they can also happen at the same time.

Some people and spiritual teachers point to differences like these:

• What feels empty: In a dark night, the emptiness is often mostly about faith and meaning. In depression, the low mood usually spreads to almost everything, like food, friends and hobbies.
• Daily life: People in a dark night often keep up with work and daily tasks. Depression often makes simple things like getting up, washing or eating very hard.
• Hope: In a dark night, a quiet longing for something more is often still there. Depression can bring deep hopelessness and a feeling that nothing will ever change.

These are rough guides, not a test. You cannot sort this out alone, and you do not have to. Depression is a real illness, and it is very treatable. Seeing a doctor or therapist does not cancel your spiritual path. Many people get help for depression and keep their faith.

There is no shortcut, but these gentle steps help many people through:

1. 1Get your health checkedStart with a doctor visit, so you know whether depression or another health problem is part of the picture.
2. 2Keep small routinesSleep, meals, a short walk each day. Simple care keeps you steady when your inner world feels shaky.
3. 3Keep showing up, gentlyYou do not have to feel anything during prayer or meditation. A few quiet minutes still count.
4. 4Tell someone the truthTalk to a trusted friend, a pastor, a spiritual director or a therapist. Saying "I feel empty" out loud often brings relief.
5. 5Write it downA journal lets you see small changes you might miss day to day.
6. 6Let go of the timelineSome dark nights last weeks, some much longer. Try not to judge yourself for how long it takes.

Many people look back on this time as a turning point. They often say they came out with a quieter faith that relies less on good feelings. That is a hope, though, not a promise, and you are allowed to find this time very hard.